Here's my current script for people who've seen me looking a little more tired and desperate than usual:
Q: So, how's the house?
A: Well we're finally to the point where we don't have to apologize to people who come over. We've passed the entry course and have signed up for intermediate classes like Ceiling Fan Installation 101 and Intro To Garbage Disposals: Yes Honey, I Know The Kitchen Smells Like Day-Old Jambalaya.
Q: You're taking classes?
A: If by classes you mean reading Home Depot books and making stuff up as I go, yes.
Q: Sweat equity, huh?
A: No one ever told me exactly what that exchange ratio was between sweat and real capital. You're better off trading pesos.
After two fun months of home ownership, I've started to work out a few tips for those who think this all looks fun:
-- There is a special circle of Hell reserved for people who paint over wallpaper.
-- Don't think you can hide stupid home improvement mistakes from future generations.
-- In nearly every case, you have to make a problem worse before you can make it better.
-- There are few tools more useful than a wrecking bar.
-- You would think that a cat would be smart enough not to hop into a paint pan full of Sunshower yellow interior eggshell latex. You would be mistaken.
-- Behind the camera of every HGTV/Discovery/Extreme Makeover show is a small platoon of people who do the actual work or correct what's going on.
OK, now for the unveiling. First, the before....
Q: So, how's the house?
A: Well we're finally to the point where we don't have to apologize to people who come over. We've passed the entry course and have signed up for intermediate classes like Ceiling Fan Installation 101 and Intro To Garbage Disposals: Yes Honey, I Know The Kitchen Smells Like Day-Old Jambalaya.
Q: You're taking classes?
A: If by classes you mean reading Home Depot books and making stuff up as I go, yes.
Q: Sweat equity, huh?
A: No one ever told me exactly what that exchange ratio was between sweat and real capital. You're better off trading pesos.
After two fun months of home ownership, I've started to work out a few tips for those who think this all looks fun:
-- There is a special circle of Hell reserved for people who paint over wallpaper.
-- Don't think you can hide stupid home improvement mistakes from future generations.
-- In nearly every case, you have to make a problem worse before you can make it better.
-- There are few tools more useful than a wrecking bar.
-- You would think that a cat would be smart enough not to hop into a paint pan full of Sunshower yellow interior eggshell latex. You would be mistaken.
-- Behind the camera of every HGTV/Discovery/Extreme Makeover show is a small platoon of people who do the actual work or correct what's going on.
OK, now for the unveiling. First, the before....
It's hard to see from this photo the exact shade of pink that covered the chair rail in the dining room. I believe it was called Expired Pepto Bismol.
And now the after:
And now the after:
Hail and huzzah, strike up the fight song Fanny! Three rooms down! Just a kitchen redo, two bathrooms and a basement to go. Oh yeah, and a room for the Wee Lance. And the office.
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